too laaaazyyyy



i woke up at 5 pm today. i went to sleep at 7 am, and i wanted to sleep more but i knew i would totally screw up my schedule if i slept for any longer. i have missed classes yesterday and missed my only one today that was from 11 30 till 2 30. these past few days have been tough because of my cold, but it finally seems to be going away.

i walked over to one of the donut and coffee shops on campus and stood in line listening to crystal castles on my i pod. i was listening to them a little loudly and it must have sounded like i was listening to lame geeky techno. no, i was listening to indie hipster electronic music. it was finally my turn to order. i ordered a small coffee with lots of sugar and milk in it, some berry yogurt, an apple juice, a toasted bagel with cream cheese on it, and 3 donuts. i have this card that has a bunch of money on it that you can only use in some stores on campus. it came with my dorm meal plan. i still have around 200 bucks on it and it feels like you are getting stuff for free when you use it. thats why i ordered so much crap. i took it all and sat down and listened to more crystal castles and ate the yogurt and drank the apple juice. then i ate half of the bagel and i didnt like it so i threw the other half away for the rats to eat. then i took my coffee and 3 donuts and walked back to my room while drinking my sweet creamy coffee.

i killed time by listening to music and looking at music reviews on the internet. then it was 7 so i had to go eat. i smoked a little bit of pot like i have been doing recently. i wont be able to smoke much pot soon in japan, so i have to smoke as much as i can right now so that i become the pot master. i went to the cafeteria and put some rice, potatos, and steamed vegetables on my plate. then i splattered gravy with mushrooms onto my food. the selection today was horrible. i sat down with a cup of coke and tasted the food. even with pot the food was tough to eat. the potatos tasted like they were crushed up once, then stuffed back together and left sitting for a week. the rice tasted like it was sitting under the sun in mexico. the vegetables tasted like they had soap in them or something, and the gravy made everything look like shit.

i ate it all and went to get some more food. i saw my good japanese friend that dances to music like a toy. i took a piece of pizza and he got a sandwich and we sat and talked. the pizza looked like a piece of human flesh. the cheese looked like skin, the tomato sauce looked like blood, and the inner cheese bread looked like fat. when i tell my friends that are eating pizza that it looks like human flesh they usually stop eating and get something else to eat. its a great way to make your friends stop eating pizza. then i went to get tea and i saw the prettiest girl i have ever seen. i see her sometimes in the cafeteria but ive never talked to her. since im moving out of residence soon i probably wont ever get to talk to her unless i man up and sit next to her or something but no, id rather just think about her face.

then my and my friend finished eating and i asked him if he was going to the library after to study because thats what the japanese friends i have here always do. he said maybe, and i told him im going because i need to work on a japanese english translation project and he told me he will help me. i went back to my room and inhaled pot smoke 3 times. gotta be the pot master, never gonna give up. then i started walking over to the library. i felt like having orange juice so i put 2 bucks into a vending machine and pressed the orange juice button. it made a sound, and gave me 25 cents back. WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ORANGE JUICE i thought in my head, and i started to walk away. then i went back and stuck my hand up the part where the orange juice should have came from. some people saw me. i must have looked like a retarded teen trying to get free juice. i walked over to another vending machine and bought another orange juice with money that my mom sent me. she always makes sure i have money. even when the family is low on money. <3

this time it worked. canadian vending machines are a joke. they still use old crappy vending machines that dont work a quarter of the time. you cant use bills, and the machine that gives you coins for bills is always out of service and even when it is, you need a clean almost unused bill or else it just gives you your bill back. in japan you never have to worry about anything like that.

i got to the library and saw my japanese friend and another japanese friend. they were with a canadian and they told me that he was writing a paper on marijuana legalization. i asked him if it would become cheaper and he said he didnt know and i immediately lost interest. he said that it would enable more research on it and stuff.

then i pulled out the japanese story and we started working on it. it was hard japanese, and we talked about how it must be hard for the other students in my class that suck at japanese. after around 30 minutes of translating we flipped a page and saw a drawing i did of a guy bad tripping on some kind of drug covered in sweat with his eyes screwed up. we both laughed and the other japanese friend that is around 24 years old came over. he looked at it and laughed. they think im really creative. the drawing wasnt that creative. i use honorifics when i talk to to the 24 year old guy, which means that i basically add "sir" after each sentence. in japanese you have to use honorifics to older people than you and its way more complicated then just adding "sir" to the end of the sentence. i dont like using it because it makes you sound like a slave. i almost never use it but one day i was with my japanese friends and we decided that i would use honorifics to the oldest of us. it makes it hard to talk to him, but it shows respect and he is nice so its fine.

we worked on my translation thing for a little more, and then came closing time. we left and i told them about my the vending machine stealing my orange juice. we made fun of vending machines here and laughed. then we got to the vending machine that stole my money and the old guy said that he will buy another one and see if 2 will come out. he said he was scared because either none could come out, one could come out, or 2 could come out. he put a coin in and it came out. we laughed. he didnt even consider that option. unable to buy. he put another one in and it also came out. we laughed. then the other guy put a coin in and it worked. we laughed again because of the randomness of it. he was able to put in all of his coins with any coming out. we all took a deep breath of air. he pressed the orange juice button, and the machine stopped for a few seconds, and then 5 drinks came out. we cheered, what an amazing miracle. he broke the curse. he gave us each an orange juice and kept the 3 other juices. we said we should write a warning for other foreign students who come from places with better technology. we couldnt think of a simple good one. i needed to go pee so i told them so and ran to the toilet near by. then i came out and we decided to write "Warning: drinks may not come out" or something like that on the warning sticker that has a picture of the vending machine falling on a person.

then i came back to my room. time to think of something to do.


boring days


i heard my red cell phone ring so i reached for it with my skin colored hand. it was my parents friend. he was going to help me with some tax papers and my paper on why i want to enter the school or art. i told him i need one more hour of sleep and one hour later he called again. he said he would pick me up in 30 minutes. i thought it would be fun to smoke a bit of pot before i met him so i took a couple of puffs. it made me feel cool. then he got to the dorms so i went out side and got into his car and we drove over to his house talking about stuff that i dont remember.

we got to his place and his gay partner was in the kitchen. i said hi to him and then their dog came running to me. the dog likes me because i pet it and play with it a lot when i go there because i get bored. they asked me if im hungry and i said yes so one of them made me a sandwich. i dont like sandwiches but it was kind of him to make me one and i ate it. curling was on and we started talking about the teams. they were hoping that either china or japan would win, but it looked like canada was going to win. they said that they hate how aggressive jennifer jones was. i didnt know that jennifer jones was aggressive because ive only seen her play once. i really like looking at her face. there is a girl in the dorms that looks exactly like her. i bet they both would be really hard to talk to, but their asses would be nice to cover with your hands. so smooth, tender, like an angel soaked in baby oil.

they had to go to some art opening and i hate going to art galleries because i always leave disappointed so i stayed at their house and wrote my paper on why i want to go to art skool. the real reason is that its the easiest way to get a degree for me and i hate studying, but i wrote a bunch of lies down. they came home and one of them checked my paper and said its good. i was relieved that it was ok. then i walked over to the cd shop. i used to buy cds every couple of days. i dont buy them at all any more. i went into the store and looked at the new releases section and saw that they had the crystal castles lp and decided to buy it. i got out of the store and made little cheerful noises with my voice. i was really happy. having an actual cd with a cd case is something i love. i wanted to get back to the gay guys' place so that i could listen. i walked fast.

the gay guys both liked the cd and told me i made an amazing purchase. the songs all sounded the same and they were all good but not amazing. i sat on the couch looking at the album art. then the dog came with a ball in its mouth but i didnt want to play the ball game. i started to pet it and it forgot about the ball. one of the guys saw me petting the dog and walked away. he must have been proud.

then supper was ready so we sat at the table. he made sticky rice for me because he knows i like it. i put some rice into my bowl and put some stir fry stuff that he made in it as well. i started eating but i couldnt taste it at all. it was because of my cold. i only ate half and started feeling a little sick. after that i played with the dog for a while and they said they will drop me off. they made me a little take home package. cookies, a sweet bun, and some of the rice and stir fry.

after i got back i slept for 2 hours and then couldnt sleep any more. i felt awful. i went on the computer and surfed the web, wondering what ill do for the rest of the night. i had absolutely nothing to do, but then one of my best friends from japan signed into MSN and i was relieved. i hadent talked to him for a while, and i didnt have to worry about boredom any more. we chatted online like nerds. then he said that he would try to get my other best russian friend ONLINE. after a little while we were all online. all on the computer. very uncool. i hadent talked to the russian friend for around 4 months. i told him im still a virgin and that i smoke pot and walk around almost every day and he told me that im so cool. like a gay cool boy. he is probably the weirdest guy i know. i told him im going to japan in 2 weeks. they both live in japan so ill get to see them very soon. i am going to punch them and grab their arms. the japanese guy has fat arms and the russian guy has skinny arms. for some reason i love grabbing their arms. they dont like it when i grab. i dont care i just wanna have fun!

i chatted online for 5 hours. pretty shameful, but it killed a lot of time. then i started feeling sick and realized i hadent ate for a long time so i took the rice and stir fry out of the fridge and ate a bit of it. i didnt care about the taste. it was cold and sick, but i needed some food in me. i felt a little better so i took a shower and came back to my room. i packed some weed in my apple, and attached it to my home made plastic bottle bong. i toked at 6 am, and it felt great. i was already feeling weird because of the cold, but the pot made it even weirder. then i layed in my bed and closed my eyes and saw cool colors. i started imagining different images in my head. weed when you have a cold is just like taking a trip into the psychedelic world of saikadelika.


i checked my clock. it was one. i missed my japanese class that starts at 12 30. i skipped the class so many times that if i missed 2 more i would fail. now that i missed todays class i cant miss any more. i think school is done in a week or something though. i dont give a damn, as long as i get ok grades.

i went to the cafeteria and there wasnt much food because it was just before dinner time starts. i went to the stir fry section and ordered some chicken stir fry dish. i got some coke and orange juice and sat down. i didnt feel like eating at all, and i could only take a couple of bites. i sat for a bit more and left. i got back into my room and thought about what to do. i had a great idea. i would become the master of bation! the god of white! i looked at some public flash porn and jacked off. after that i listened to the song "irene" by caribou a bunch of times. i love it. then i went to the bank machine and checked if i had any money but i didnt. i had 15 bucks, and i was basically out of pot. i phoned the pot dealer on campus and went to his room. he was with the biggest pot head in residence. he is high all day. i fainted and had a small seizure when i first smoked with him when i first came to canada. i asked how much i could get for 15 bucks and the dealer thought a little and told me almost 2 grams, i said cool thanks and then he said actually 1.5 grams. i said ok, slightly disappointed. he put it in a little baggy with the canadian flag on it. i left the room, and got back into my room to take the stems off of the weed. i looked at the baggy and instead of a maple leaf there was a red pot leaf. then i took all of the stems out of my weed and put it back into the baggy.

i decided to go eat dinner at 7. i thought it would be a good idea to smoke some pot before i went and ate so that i could eat more than i would with out pot. i smoked around 0.1 grams and it felt fuckin AAA. it made me feel smooth. i walked over to the cafe and inside, i saw my korean friend and started talking to him. then i saw my japanese friend. we sat together and talked about my cold and ate.

i came back to my room and started listening to crystal castles. then i picked up my bass guitar and thought of something cool so i recorded it and recorded more stuff. i havent been recording that much so it was new and fun, and it was easier to come up with new ideas. i kept recording stuff and erasing and i finally came up with around 7 seconds of music that i like. i was a little bit happy. then i read peoples posts on the SLAP skateboard message board and decided to update this blog. writing blogs about boring days isnt that fun, but i feel better that i finished it now. i dont know what im going to do now. ive only been up for 8 hours and im not tired. 2 more weeks of living alone in residence.